The phrase “You’ve got time” is a double-edged sword. It has recently been added to my short list of hated phrases.
I have time.
I have time to travel; time to read everything that has been on hold since I’ve been in school; time to be published; time to become a great writer; time to save money; time to find Myself and a career that will combine passion and financial security. But this way of thinking is what keeps me from accomplishing these goals. Worse of all, it keeps me from focusing on what is important. I’m writing this post, on the basis of feeling grief, sorrow, sympathy and remorse.
When Jaime and I moved back from Germany, we both thought, “We have nothing but time now”. I have time to work on Grad school, get a job, save money to buy a house and this has transpired. I’m not complaining, but when everything is going to plan, we forget about the unexpected. As I write this, I feel a bit silly because I’m writing about how much time we have, but how much time do we dedicate spending it doing something important or visiting the ones we love?
On August 12th, Jaime’s aunt, a woman who he considered his second mother, but most importantly a woman I considered my friend, passed away. Judy Richter was a brave woman; she lost her legs and half of her abdomen as an adolescent. And although this occurred, this privation was not enough to keep my strong willed friend from pursing a college education or from following her dreams of working with children. Doing all of this, while commuting on public transportation.She truly was an inspiration, she had a positive outlook and did not allow anyone to have pity for her and these were all qualities that I admired.
On our way home from the hospital after Judy had passed away, Jaime admitted to me that he believes Judy cheated death on more than one occasion. I believe this conclusion gives my husband comfort. Judy not only lost her legs in her youth but was also a cancer survivor…not once, but twice.
Judy, it’s almost been a month since we watched you leave us and I still have a hard time believing it. I wanted to take an opportunity to say Thank You. Thank you for supporting us; Thank you for accepting me; Thank you for supporting my writing and loving it; Thank you for supporting my crazy endeavors, but most importantly for being such an amazing woman in my husband’s life. Thank you for always setting him straight when he was out of line; for hearing him out whenever he needed to talk and thank you for always letting us know, that no matter what, you loved us. We love you too.
So…Time. It’s precious and we often take it for granted. We focus on being connected with Facebook, phones at dinner tables, etc. I get it, spending time together, but not really together. I know what needs to be said is “Yeah, you got time”, just don’t forget about the unexpected.